The Rapture

Over on FaceBook I've written a few things, mostly questions about what will happen after the rapture. Last night my friend Vicki Cheatwood blogged about the rapture in such a deep way that I realized my questions were just dancing around on the surface of what I was trying to ask. What I am actually feeling.
I was asking things like will I still be able to garden, and what will happen to all the animals that get left behind, and who is going to deal with all the stuff that is left behind by those who rise up ... Vicki asks a more serious question: if you knew the date and hour of your end time today, what would you be doing? are you anywhere near where you want to be? are you doing what you want to be doing? are you with the people you want and need to be with?
I am. Finally in my life, I am. I am writing every day. I am with my daughter and grandkids. I am in touch with my son and his daughter. I talk with my Mom every week. I am surrounded by great friends whom I see regularly. I have a garden again. So, yes, this is exactly where I want to be.
Am I ready for a whole host of my family and friends to rise up in the rapture and leave me behind? No. I have abandonment issues. The truth is I'm no more ready to lose them one at a time. It's this whole topic of death, letting go, being left behind.
Which is really the issue of attachment -- and time for me to go back to sangha, find a Buddhist sangha group and renew my own spiritual practice.
What has all this talk of the rapture brought up in your life?

Writing success

How do you measure success? We all have our ways. For me success usually means either productivity or outside acknowledgement. This year, I'm achieving both. I've joined listserves to help keep me prolific: one in which I commit to writing 100 words a day for 100 days; one in which I commit to writing a new poem every day; one in which I commit to writing (and posting) 15 pages of work every week; and for my health a Daily Challenge that is related to health. I've belonged to the 15 pages/week for years, disappearing for months at a time, but have been active again now for several months again. So far in 2011, I have written over 60 new poems, which I will edit and polish next year, unless I decide to stop writing new work and start editing at some point this year.
Meanwhile, I continue to send out my edited work, and have had three poems accepted so far this year. One to Mom Egg, one to Stillwater Review, and one to be published in the book "paying attention: a river of stones."
On the days I have a migraine, I write migraine poems (3 so far this year). I've written with a temp of 102 when I had the flu. I wrote through the flu, an ear infection, beautiful days of sunshine when I could have been gardening, the weekends, and sheer laziness when I didn't "feel like it." Commitment is a powerful motivator. For me.

Bucket list revisited

Making a bucket list turns out to be a good idea! Everything I put on that list has stayed on my mind. So, when a close friend called to discuss a play that we both saw -- not together -- we also checked in. Turns out she is taking a class in beginning Italian. She is also fluent in Spanish, so she's learning Italian quickly. Aha! an opportunity for me to refresh my Italian, and have a friend with whom to converse. I asked if I could join her class (in mid-session), she said of course, so I am. We can practice together, and soon I will actually have a second language. Va bene!

January 31 small stones aros

I returned my pet rocks to the wild. Now they hide in my garden or wait quietly at my door for me to notice them once again.

january 19 small stones aros

celebrating birthdays gives me pause. i stop to wonder if i'm celebrating having completed a year, or having arrived at a new one.

January 17 small stone aros

life is short, the road is long, this is the paradox.

january 14 small stones aros

dreams large and small, day and night, these are slide show videos, free pictures we are free to choose or deny sent to us by our own universe.